The Secret I've Always Kept
by Maggie O'Casiry
Summary: Inspired by the hints Professor Thornhill gives her daughter, Snow in "Story's End," by Marissa Burt, it explores her past. In it, Adelaide Thornhill takes the readers back to when she met Snow's father and explains why everything she associates with him is now painful.


The Secret I've Always Kept

By: Maggie O'Casiry

Hello everyone, it's me Professor Adelaide Thornhill. In "Story's End" I gave Snow hints as to my past, but truly I could never reveal who her father is or what happened with him. It's time my tale is told and I will take you directly back to the past and how the events befell.

I sat on the steps inside our small cottage and heard my parents screaming probably over something small. It was a typical day in my home. I glanced at my older sister and she had the same sorrowful gaze in her eyes. We both hated when our parents fought and it never would get better. Our parents always were too concerned in their arguments to have paid any attention to the two of us. I pulled my satchel over my shoulder and took my sister's hand. "We can escape all of this, and we don't have to wait until we are older. We can slip out now and not look back. Will you come with me?" She stared at me for a long moment and then shook her head. "Why not?"

She softly informed, "Addie, I cannot leave them, they need our help or mine at least to repair them. I want it to be like when they never fought."

"Was there even such a day? They'll never repair what is broken. We need to leave to have the best of life we can get."

"I'm sorry. I will be free from them once I am married and move in with him. Our wedding is scheduled for a little less than a year. If you go, I wish you only the best. Please do not forget me."

"I'll never forget you. Take care and come find me if you get in trouble or if it gets unbearable here." With tears falling from both of us, we hugged. Then I ran out the door without even being noticed and did not stop running.

I saw the Enchanted Forest, but didn't know of its dangers then and entered. I ran and ran until I was surrounded by the dense forest and was lost. I realized then I had nowhere to go, no home. I crashed to my knees and cried for a while. I have no idea how much time passed. I felt a hand fall upon my shoulder and I spun around hoping to see my sister, but it was not her. A kind young man gazed at me and sought, "What's wrong?"

Shaking I replied, "I have nowhere to go and I don't even know where I am."

"Milady, you are in the Enchanted Forest, which no lady should ever wander alone, it is very dangerous. You can stay with me, I have a little home."

"I do not even know you."

"Forgive me. I am Daniel and I'm 15. Who are you?"

"Adelaide Thornhill and I am 16. Why are you in this forest alone, if you said no one should travel here alone?"

"I've lived here many years and have learned how to survive."

"Why would your parents raise a child here?"

"They didn't, the leprechauns raised me. My parents vanished one day and I wandered looking for them. I ended up finding this place. May I ask where your parents are?"

"Never mind them, they will never notice I am not there. I would rather never return to that dreaded place, which is why I have nowhere."

"You do now because you have me."

Daniel led me back to the ivy covered little home made from what looked like a cave. It had a door though and inside there was a floor and lights and it felt like a home. He smiled and gestured for me to enter. He held my eyes for a long moment and then mentioned, "You are really beautiful and your eyes shimmer like the stars." I blushed and my words were lost in my throat. I tried to murmur, "Thank you," but his stare was so intense my throat got so tight I could barely breathe. He clearly could sense I was struggling and he took a step closer to me. The air circled him and I got a whiff of his sweet enchanting smell. The world melted away and all I could see and think of was Daniel. My heartache from home was gone and there before me stood only him. The space between us grew smaller and I felt my heart pounding more and more. I couldn't breathe. Then before I knew what was happening, his lips encased mine. I could not move. I didn't want to. I wanted the moment to last forever. They were so warm and welcoming. I was home.

Then he pulled away and hovered near for a moment. For an instant I thought, I hoped, he would kiss me again, but he pulled farther away. "I am so sorry, I just, I just . . ." he stammered, but dashed inside leaving his sentence unfinished.

"Daniel," my voice was so soft and begging for more, I barely recognized myself. I followed him in. I feel as though I have known him for a thousand years, but it's not even been a day. The place was really small and I saw him sitting on the bed in the corner. He glanced up with watery eyes and I saw his lips quivering. I wanted to speak, but I didn't know what to say.

Luckily he spoke and the silence was obliterated, "I am so sorry, I should never have. You don't know me and I do not know you. I got caught in your beauty and I do not know what overcame me. Please forgive me, if you are able."

"Daniel, I already have." I was so drawn to him, as I spoke I moved towards him without thinking. I placed my hand on his shaking back and felt the trembles beneath steady out. "Perhaps we are meant to be together and this is the start of some amazing adventures."

His spirits lifted and his eyes sparkled. "I sure hope so!" He paused and then realized he didn't show me around his small home. "Welcome to my home. This is the whole place, all in this one room. This is my bed, that's the kitchen, and there is the chair I sit in to relax. Sorry it is so petite."

"That's alright, I'm thankful for anyplace safe to stay."

"I know it's not a Queen or King size bed, but you can share the bed with me . . . not in a weird way."

"That is very kind of you, but I would not want to intrude on your space, I can sleep on the floor."

"Absolutely not! The floor is no place for a lady.

Evening fell and I climbed in on the right side of the little bed with him to my left. It was cramped and very uncomfortable – the mattress was great, but the situation awkward. I lied their flat on my back as stiff as a rock. He sensed my fears and wound his hand around mine. Instantly all of my unease ceased and I became quite comfortable. I shifted and pulled myself closer to him, curling my body around his. Suddenly, there was a whole lot more space on the bed. My bed at my previous home had been larger than his, so I really hope I do not roll off.

All night, he held me in his arms and I did not fall off thanks to him. I opened my eyes and found him not at my side. I sat up and got a scent of something warm. I saw in the part he called the kitchen, Daniel cooking something. He glanced over and noticed I was awake. "Good morning, milady. Did you sleep well?"

Sleepily I answered, "The best in years. I am so thankful I found you!" I climbed out of bed and hugged him tight. He smiled and turned around to face me. His gentle hand brushed down my cheek and I felt a pulse of magic spiral through me. Then he and I squished together on the arm chair and ate breakfast. For a very brief moment, I pictured my sister at home without me to protect her from our parents. However, I then realized what I had was greater. I had found where I belonged: Here with Daniel.

Three days went by and I knew I was in love with this boy and it seemed he reciprocated the feelings. We were outside walking through the Enchanted Forest enjoying the beautiful day hand in hand. Randomly, he stopped and turned to face me. He ran his fingers down my face and smiled sweetly. Then he kissed me and my heart skipped several beats. Oh how wonderful it was. It was like a dream. He grinned again and stated boldly, "Adelaide, I love you!" My heart fluttered and I never knew such joy in my entire life. I never had anyone care about me, nor love me, except maybe my sister. It was an emotion I was not familiar with. I was loved and wanted and everything was perfect.

I managed to respond, "I love you too! You are the best thing that has ever happened to me."

"I'm glad." Again he closed the space between us and sealed my lips with his. I wish these moments would never end, but he pulled away and glanced towards the woods. I followed his gaze and caught a glimpse of a lady with red hair disappear through the trees. I searched Daniel for answers, curious if he knew who she was, but his eyes gave no hint. I asked him, but he shrugged and we walked on. His expression was cold and I gathered he knew well who she was, but they had history that he did not want to discuss. I let it go knowing he would tell me when he is ready.

A week went by and I fell more in love with Daniel every day to the point, I could barely recall the time he wasn't in my life. Rarely did we see the red-haired lady in the woods, but we did once or twice after that first encounter. She and Daniel would meet eyes and then she would dash away without a word spoken and she always kept her distance too. I started to wonder if she was a threat, but he assured me she was not and merely curious. How would he know that unless they had known each other? It was a mystery, but I was going to let it that way.

Daniel and I were out collecting ingredients to make dinner tonight when he noticed she was sitting under a tree with her back towards us. He ignored her and kissed me to clear any questions I might have been thinking about her, but for once, I let it go. He lit up as if a brilliant idea suddenly popped in his mind. I seen his eyes glow before, but never as much as they had in this moment. He gasped, "Hey what if we spice things up this evening?"

"What do you mean?" I questioned.

"Well instead of going straight to sleep after talking, what if you let me rock your world?"

I was silent for a moment. I heard that phrase before, but I wasn't as familiar with it. Then it clicked. My eyes grew wide in alarm and I cried, "No! Absolutely not! Daniel, you're 15 and I'm 16, far too young to become parents. I do not want to be a mother, not yet at least."

He chuckled and brushed my hair behind my ear and ran his hand down my cheek, his favorite thing to do. He tilted my head up to look him straight in the eyes. Sternly he replied, "Trust me I do not want to be a father yet either. It doesn't have to go to that level, it can be avoided.

"Ok, but still I am so young and I–" There was no second in between he quieted me with a kiss and I felt all of my concerns melt away. I became obliged and gave in mumbling softly as he lips separated from mine, yet hovered near, "Very well. I am yours."

The lady turned her head and for a moment gazed at the two of us. Her eyes seemed to shine sorrow or pain, but I could not tell. A shadow came across her eyes as she went to face the other way again. Then it dawned on me. "You two had once loved each other, didn't you?" I inquired. He didn't say anything and kept walking purposely ignoring me. For the first time since I had escaped my home, it was as though the past was repeating where I was brushed under the carpet. Ignored. Forgotten. Not important. The pain welled up inside of me and I wanted to explode. "Did you?" I pressed as we walked on, but he kept his mouth shut. "Daniel, why can you not just tell me who she is and how you know her?"

He exploded, "Because I don't like talking about it Adelaide!" Tears brimmed in his eyes and I realized my mistake in pressuring him because it troubled him so much. He sighed heavily and walked off. I followed.

"I am really sorry, I did not realize it was a painful memory. I–"

"Enough! Look I get it, you are curious and are wondering why she lingers around the woods so awkwardly. I know, she is mysterious and acts odd when we are near. I know! I do not know why she is lurking around. Every time you bring her up, it brings up the past I want to forget. So please for me, Adelaide, do not mention her."

"I won't," I vowed and he forced a faint smile.

That evening when the sun disappeared and the bright moon rose, the two of us were preparing for bed. I then recalled what Daniel had asked of me earlier and my anxiety rose. He had a hard day though, thanks to me, so I owed it to him. Still that was not enough to settle my mind or nerves. He clearly saw straight through me and knew I was dwelling on it again, yet he didn't speak. "Ready for bed?" he asked and I nervously nodded.

I crawled into bed with my heart pounding. Daniel came to join me. I was shaking so badly. He fingered the edge of my shift gown. My legs were fidgety and shifting. It was nerves. I was scared. His fingers began crawling up my leg like a spider. My heart pounded more. I could barely breathe. Then I lost all control. I sprang from bed and screamed, "No! I can't do it!"

"It will be alright, I promise," he tried to calm me down, but it did little to help. He clasped my hand and kissed me. Once I again I was secure and was home. I stopped shaking and my fears dissipated.

He pulled me onto the bed without letting go of my wrist and kissed me. Daniel flipped immediately and before I could think, he had me pinned. This time, he didn't dawdle and raised my shift until I was exposed. "Daniel, please don't," I begged near tears. He gazed blankly into my eyes displaying no emotion. His skin got closer to mine and my fears were rising faster than I could have imagined possible. "Please, please, please!" I tried so hard to withhold my emotions, but it didn't work. I found myself bawling my eyes out, hoping, praying, he would stop before it was too late. But he didn't. "STOP!" I screamed. He looked in my eyes no expression of sympathy, no pity, no remorse, no understanding. "Daniel!" It didn't matter how much I cried out for him to knock it off, he didn't listen. He did not care he was hurting me.

An eternity went by it seemed until he finally got off of me and released me. I was trembling more than an earthquake and couldn't breathe. I lied my arm across my sore chest from where he had dug his nails. I looked at him with horror. While I had the chance, I sprang and ran out the door. I didn't care what was in the Enchanted Forest, surely it couldn't be as much of a beast as him. As I ran past the home, I saw the lady strolling in the distance. I didn't care and kept running. I had no plan where I was going, I just wanted to get away from Daniel. A heavy rain came out of nowhere and cleared my mind more. How did I ever love that monster? My feelings for him were gone as though they had never existed. And how did I so foolishly fall in love in the first place in a day?

I waved my hand in the air and made a vision of him appear. A part of me deep down wanted to see him sobbing, regretting what he had done to me. However, he sat on the bed undisturbed. A knock came from the door and he opened it. There stood the lady. I had to see this. Daniel forced a smile and she did the same. Then she said, "I am so sorry, I have missed you so much. I was wrong to leave you as I had. I belong with you, I always have. I hope I am not too late though to realize that, but I may be because you now have that other girl." She ended her last sentence by rolling her eyes and speaking coldly. I knew she meant me.

Then before my eyes, Daniel became older like early 20s and it fit him. I realized then, I had been deceived, he was not 15. He responded with a smile, "I am glad you came to that realization. I do not love that girl, never have, and never will. I could care less about her. I used her to get through to you and it worked. I love you, Giselle. I missed you and had to do all I could to win you back."

"Well I'm back and I will never leave you again. Daniel, I love you."

Heartbroken, I swirled the vision away and melted down in more tears. I curled up in the cold night air on the ground and cried. Eventually, I cried myself to sleep.

The next morning, I woke up not where I had been, but somewhere new. I was clothed in a cloak and was in a large bed. I ached all over from last night and didn't have the strength to sit up. I glanced around as best as I could without moving too much. I saw a man standing off to the side mixing something. He smiled as he caught my eye. "Good morning, I'm Amaranth, the Warlock. How are you feeling?" he sought.

"Awful, my body hurts," I whined.

"Daniel did quite a number on you."

"How do you know about him?"

"I know many things my dear. Like I know he enchanted you to believe you loved him, when you didn't. He manipulated you and hurt you really badly. Adelaide, he has made you with child." My jaw dropped. Me? With child? This could not be happening. Just when I thought things were terrible, it had gotten worse. I never should have run from home because then I wouldn't be trapped in this situation. "I am so sorry, you do not deserve all that he has done to you. Right now I am mixing you a potion that will help heal your wounds. I know, I sense you are scared to trust me and I do not blame you. I promise I mean no harm. Look, I can teach you how to defend yourself against evil like him. I can teach you to enchant people and how to avoid enchantments."

"Why would you do that for me?"

"You need to heal and you need someplace safe and someone you can trust. I need a friend that can help me around the tunnels and you are a wise lady. Will you be my apprentice?"

I thought on it for a moment. He didn't seem like Daniel and his eyes shone light. I honestly believe I could trust him, but I was still hesitant. I then recalled a lesson I learned in school that told about Warlock Amaranth and he was portrayed as an amazing person. Finally I gave in and nodded.

So I became the Warlock's Apprentice and it was the best thing that I could have done. He healed my wounds or at least my physical ones, my mental ones have yet to fully heal. Under his wing, I became an Enchantress. I hardened my shell, which is why I seem like a Villain. I'm not, I am only guarded. Snow – who I named because she was pure and innocent – was born and I saw Daniel in her and I lost all control. Immediately, I took her to my sister, who was now living with the man she planned to marry, away from our parents. Snow took on her uncle's last name, Wotton. I went back to Amaranth to heal more, hoping to leave the past forever as that. Now do you see why I don't want Snow to know the secret I've always kept?


End file.
